Control, Emotions and the Stock Market

Repeatedly you hear that you have to control your emotions in the stock market. I think this is actually non-sense. Control is such a reactive word and it makes you fearful of your emotions and if you are fearful of your emotions you are being controlled by them.

In my experience you cannot control your emotions, we can try to ignore them, but that will only get you so far and you will get very confused and waste a lot of energy, even sick.

Through reading lots of books on investing I see the top investors have learned to work with their emotions, but emotions like the markets can not be controlled. They ebb and flow depending on the stimulus and information that is available. Ray Dalio meditates twice a day, not to control his emotions, but to take that time to clear his body and mind so he can function optimally.

Our emotions are always giving us feedback. That feedback is always I like that, or I don’t like that. We give those two feelings all sorts of names, but if we boil it down to the bare minimum we will see that that is it.

How do you know what you want until you feel it? How do you know what you don’t want until you feel it? These two feelings come up as pleasure and pain. Excessive amounts of both will lead us into trouble.

Who do you want to be? Some one who is torn apart with stress, or someone that surfs the waves of energy.

I tried to control my emotions for many years and got very un-well as a result. The stress on my system trying to control them tore my body apart. I was ignoring my stress, my issues, they just built up and up until I broke.

If you are trying to control your emotions, you are being controlled by your emotions because you are constantly in reaction to them, you constantly have to fight them every day and that wastes energy and focus, when you could be working with your emotions.

What would happen if you where not emotionally caught up in the stock market? Would you be a better trader? What does it feel like to be caught up in the markets? Stressful? What would happen if you took a step back and gave your self some space and relaxed? Would your mind become more clear because your emotions / feedback would have told you i don’t like being caught up in the markets.

We do not have good and bad emotions all our emotions all of the time are looking out for us and giving us feedback, it may be painful, but it is always empowering. We just need to learn how to listen.

What is your intuition, but a feeling? what is a hunch, but a feeling? what is hot and cold but a feeling. We get feedback from our feelings all the time. If something doesn’t feel right, its saying pay attention.

So back to control, why would you want to control all this feedback? have you ever just got a feeling someone wasn’t telling the truth, or holding something back? Was that feeling valuable?

Emotions are going to do what they are going to do! They come up and go just like the waves in the ocean, you can either fight them and waste energy or you can work with them and surf.

The more we relax, the more we feel, the more we feel the more we can process, the more effective we become and ultimately make better decisions. :

So what would happen if you decided to start listening to your emotions? What would happen?

How does this apply to the stock market? If you are not listening to your pleasures and pains, you are not getting feedback from your environment! You are not utilizing all the most effective information that is available to you?

If a trade is going against you, what do you feel? Does that pain empower you to think differently?

Are there traders who feel calm when the market is going down? Does your pain force you to ask the question, what are they doing differently?

What does that tell you? What is that feeling telling you? It is saying pay attention to me. I am telling you I don’t like this. let’s do something different. It is your job to start thinking at this point to become more effective in your investing.

George Soros is a good example when his back starts hurting him, he knows something is off in the market for him and he pulls out of his positions.

Warren buffet has had enough pain to where he has learned to for him to be most effective it is to invest long term. He also likes doing trades that are so simple and easy that its like taking candy off a baby. His pleasures and pains have guided him to where he is for the most part happy.

What would happen you if you started listening to your feelings and started writing them down? Would you slow down? would you step out of the emotion of the market? Would you learn something new? Would you be able to make clearer decisions, if you slowed down and stepped back from the market?

Does Warren Buffett get caught up in the emotions of the markets?

Would you stop fighting with yourself and start working with yourself fully

 

When our mind and emotions are aligned we become vastly more effective!

Our emotions give us feedback we like something, or we don’t. They raise red flags for us to pay attention to what we like and don’t. They are calling us to be more aware all the time.

What ways can you step back from the markets and become more present and get all the feedback available to you. How can you become more present, aware and not caught up in the markets?

Its really simple listen to the whole of you! if you are listening to you you are not listening to the market! Relax into your body and take a deep breath and get the feedback.

 

 

How to be present!

How feeling is listening.

Have you ever felt static electricity from a balloon on your skin or hair?

Have you ever felt hot or cold on or in your body?

Have you ever felt, as a child, when you get into your parent’s house, you open the door, and all of a sudden, you realize you’re in trouble?

Have you ever felt the warm welcoming feeling of your parent’s house even when they are not there?

Have you ever been given directions to a new place and as you drive up the road, you feel that you should turn or stop?

Have you ever felt, some one is not telling you everything?

Have you ever felt, some one is angry or upset?

Have you ever felt, that you said the wrong thing?

We hear a lot in the world about being present, but what is that, if you have never experienced it? We have all experienced it, just we never knew what it was.

All those questions above, are to bring you the memory of feelings where you have been present.

Feelings are present, they are now. When we learn to listen to our feelings, we are being present.

What is going on in your body now? What do you feel? Feel your feet on the ground, relax and feel fully into your whole body, take a deep breath and feel deeper into your body. Listen to what is going on and what do you feel?

All the time our body is giving us feedback on what is going on in our environment. Sometimes we get gut feelings, that something is right for us or not. What is that feeling? Is it intuition?

How do we know we like or love someone?

What is stress actually telling us? Have you ever listened to it? What would happen if you listened to your stress? Have you ever told your stress or problems to someone else, who listened to you and as a result you felt better? Where you able to see the situation more effectively once you did? Did that stress empower you to learn, grow, to connect and improve? Did that stress just say I don’t like a certain thing, lets do something about it?

The process is simple. We do not control our emotions! The come and go as they please, like waves on the ocean we can either fight them or work with them.  How do you feel if you are ignored, more or less emotive? haha? How do you feel when you are listened to? More or less emotive? What would happen if we stopped trying to control our emotions and actually listened to ourselves?We only have two emotions and its not good and bad ones, those two words are actually judgement’s, all emotions are empowering. They are always saying one of two things, I like that, or I don’t like that, or in more effective words, I’d like something else / different. So, because our feelings are telling us through pleasure and pain, that we like or don’t like things, they are guiding us towards what we do want, all the time. So, they are always looking out for us and caring for us. So, they are always empowering us. as long as we learn to listen.

What is loving yourself? Its such a vague statement! How do you feel when you are listened to deeply, by your friends or partners? Do you feel appreciated, acknowledged, cared for, valued or loved? So is listening to yourself fully loving yourself?

What would happen if you listened to yourself every day? Would you feel more present grounded. simply take a deep breath and listen to your body now what is it telling you?