Winning and losing in the stock market.

 

I feel there is a misconception in the investing world that there are winners and losers, but this goes further than just investing it goes into life!

If some one is winning some one is losing, but I just can’t see that.

If I buy one stock off one person, who is happy to sell it to me and I sel

l it to someone else who is happy to buy it off me, I am being of service, I am not winning or losing. I am just making decisions that work for me.

I am not responsible for other people and their decisions, if they are not happy with it after they buy it off me, that is their decision, but again I haven’t competed with any one, it is a free market. They could of bought it off millions of other people, at millions of other times. So, at that very moment he was happy I am not pulling one over on any one. If some one buys great if not I’m left with my decisions.

Do people lose in the stock market yes 100% they do, but am I in their race? No not at all!!! I am in my own race!!

To explain this further. If I was to come second or even come last in a race with Usain Bolt would I be a winner or loser. Well to me I’d be winning I’d be just happy to get that experience. So, in my world I would be a winner! Or in other words happy!

So, who are we competing with? actually no one. We create a story in our mind that there is a competition because people win and lose in their race, but we are not in their race.

So, what is the competition? or is there one at all? Well I want to improve every day that is the only challenge I have. So, I am only really racing against myself.

So, what does these concepts of winning and losing do for us? what would happen if we dropped the idea of competition altogether and started looking at what is really there. Let’s drop the lenses of winning and losing.

If I make a trade and it does not do what I want it to do, have I lost? Am I a loser? I know if I learn a valuable lesson I become wiser and I’m more able to make better decisions the next time. Do i like it? no, but i am not a loser!

So, do I win by learning? or do I win by my trades making me money? I don’t win anything either way there is nothing to win there are only lessons.

Now what does the stock market look like to you?

The way I look at things now is, how can I grow? Winning comes from insecurity wanting to be better than someone and losing is the same. But who cares? no one else does.

My goal is to become more and more effective. I know if I constantly aim to be more effective I’ll be looking at the market for what it is! an opportunity to grow, mentally, emotionally and financially. If it goes up I win, if it goes down I win, I’m always winning, because my goal has nothing to do with any one else and is focused on what is going to get me the results I want in the long term.

Pain and pleasure are real, winning and losing are not. Yes, I feel pain when I don’t have a great trad but how I make that feel better is by learning. But if I believe in winning and losing trades, I’ll feel like a loser and not learn, that will only go into developing some sort of self-image as a trader.

 

So, by setting our focus on what is effective, we see the world through a completely different lenses, one that works and empowers us!

Where else in life is this relevant to you?

Re-evaluating my goals.

My plan to speak at pendulum summit got derailed, for the past few months.

I set an audacious goal, and didn’t really know what I was getting myself in for.

Just like all goals, plan A didn’t work also plan b, c,d, and e. But now finally after trailing and fail-learning and a bit of de-motivation, I am getting the picture back of what I wanted 9 months ago.

I can see myself speaking on stage and the energy in the place being off the charts. I know the type of energy I want, because I’ve was a DJ, and I know when a place is electric. 3 or 4 thousand people, with a real drive, to be the best that they can be. Just even saying this pumps me up.

I got derailed like every one, my goal was going to take a lot more effort than I thought. But that is the mark of a real goal. Something that will grow you. I had all the pieces but had no idea how long and how to put them together.

My naive assumption at the start of the year was, I’d put out a bunch of videos and get traction, and that was it. Haha. So funny now. Totally delusional. But again that is the mark of a true goal.

So, I’ve melted my own head over, and over, just like every entrepreneur, and it didn’t seem as much fun, as it originally did. It started feeling like it was going to be a lot of hard work.

My plan originally was to do a bit of online marketing, and get a job with Pendulum Summit doing marketing, network with all the top people, and develop an opportunity that way.

What has come about, is I’ve had to start a media company, to build my own brand, which still doesn’t exist. So I’ve had to do a lot of study, and growing, than originally planned.

I started a meet up group,(The Epic Life Group) because I needed experience as an actual speaker. Yea that’s how delusional, this goal was. I fucking love it. Totally nuts.

Because I got disillusioned by the scale of things, my energy started to go, and I realized, I had a lot less time, than I originally thought. I was aiming to have all my stuff together at the end of the year, and I’d get a place to speak. But thanks to DJ and Journalist, Mark Kavanagh, I realized I had a lot less time. I actually had to get my shit together months in advance, because that is when they would finalize the lineup. Yea as I said I was delusional. Haha

So through setting up the Meet-up group, that became much more interesting, and of much more value, than speaking at pendulum summit. I was getting in a small way, what I was aiming for in speaking at Pendulum.

I said to myself, sure if I just build this group to thousands of people, I wont need pendulum.

So I carried on with that vision for a few months and had to think about growing the group, so I started reading lots of books, and marketing stuff, primarily @garyvee and today I realized, that I was struggling with my marketing message.

I realized that I had no direction, for what I was doing, I lost my north star. My vision had evaporated.

I was reading this stuff to grow the group, but to what end. It was vague and mushy.

Over the past few months, I had felt this vagueness, but I had no idea what it was. I went from being proactive, to just reading stuff that seemed like being productive, but it wasn’t leading anywhere.

I am reminded again, and again, that we have to have a north star, a destination, a goal because, that puts what we are doing, now, in context, and gives what we are doing, now, purpose.

I was proactively lost.

I can even see it in the epic life group, I had lost that drive to grow, by being vague, and the group, I feel,could feel that too. Every bit of content I was putting out was great, but it lacked that bit of drive, and conviction, that direction. What we are all doing this for. We want epic lives, that is why, we are here, and that energy, was faltering.

I understand on a whole new level, the purpose of goals, so much more now. Goals are not to be attained, but they are there as tools to help you grow.

The goal itself is irrelevant, the journey is the most important thing. It is who you become as a result of your journey, that is most important. But! the goal gives you direction.

This goal has gone from being something fun, to something much more serious, it is now become a mark of my growth, as a man, a person, as a person who can make a difference, to his own life, and as a result the people around him.

The goal has gone from being a selfish one, to one that I hope will empower others.

I know now, that I am mad late, on speaking at pendulum, but miracles happen every day.

I am re-energized, and clear again on what I want to do, and why. We all go through these processes. If you are to take one thing away from this, is just keep going, keep moving forward, and things will become clear eventually.

If  I had have stopped, I would not have a second chance now, and I gave myself that second chance.

My energy and clarity is back.

I see myself in the Dublin Exhibition Center speaking to 3 thousand people, and bringing them on a journey that empowers the fuck out of them. I see the place going nuts, for themselves, because they will see how far, they have come, through my story.

If I can be so delusional, and keep going, so can anyone. I can tell you now, I am 100% a better person for all the effort I have put in. Win, loose, or draw I have grown, and that is the real purpose of goals.

I can not go back to who I was, and one way or another, I am going to have better things because of this.

I look forward to meeting you on our Epic Journey’s

 

Chronic fatigue and the battle of mind over matter part 2

I’m on day 7 of my hunger strike. Ha ha only joking.

I’ve actually just started day seven of my 14 day fast. I’ve just been drinking lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper, oh and heaps of water and some salt cleanses too, not nice but necessary, the lemon juice is nice even after 21 or so litres of it.

The first two days where tough but gradually it’s been getting easier and easier. Some times and i mean only sometimes, i get a real craving for something but then i just drink more juice and i get back on track its nuts. I guess it’s just practice, I’m getting used to it now.

To be completely honest thought, I feel better than I have for months and on a whole, if you add all the days together, I feel better than i have for years.

I have come to realise that there are two main aspects to my chronic fatigue. One is mental and the other is physical.  The mental is affecting the physical and in return the physical is affecting the mental. It is a vicious cycle.

I’ve tried blood tests; I’m all clear and normal.

I’ve tried food allergy tests, I have lots of intolerances, eliminated most of them for a year, but this only stressed me out, as I was constantly worrying about what i had eaten wrong when I was tired. This in hindsight was really the worst thing to do and a waste of a year. Our intolerances go the less stressed we are. (Certain situations are different but generally)

I’ve tried nutrition / vitamins that had worked a bit, but it’s not done much.

I’ve tried a Candida diet where I ate no sugar or carbs for a month. That was a waste of time also. But this can work for some worth a check out.

I’ve been to doctors, nutritionists, dieticians, naturopaths and every other health care person I could think of. Doctors, nutritionist’s, dieticians, haven’t a clue about how to be healthy.  Naturopaths are the way to go if you’re looking to get healthy. The other people recommend bull that has been recommended by pharmaceutical companies and the meat industry.

Through all that, I’ve tried different alternative healing modalities like, bio energy healing this was the most effective thing I’ve done, but it didn’t last for me. I got a fantastic month where I felt on top of the world but gradually the fatigue crept in. I still had the bad habits that got me into the mess in the first place.

Through all my tests, trials and tribulations, what I have found is that I’ve been stressed. I have a very active brain, a lot of ambition and an even greater impatience. That has been pushing me forward at a great pace, but ambition coupled with negative beliefs and a lot of impatience, with myself, has caused a lot of frustration, which is ultimately stress. Imagine on top of that being tired all the time, it is a disaster waiting to happen.

Our bodies are not designed to be hyped up the time, we are supposed to get stressed, then relax and rejuvenate. Because we over work or bodies and we deplete our stores, effectively we start to run on empty. This is where we start to lose the battle it is a downhill struggle from here.

The mechanism I’m explaining is our animal instincts, running over drive. Our flight or fight mechanism, our survival instinct. Imagine 100,000 years ago in the jungle a lion jumps out and we run and hide. The lion triggered our stress response, which shuts down non essential parts of our bodies and hypes up the essential ones to get away, like your heart and muscles, Makes sense, but then we hide and relax, then carry on with our low stress lives, we rest and recover from the attack.

In this modern age we have lots of low level startles every day. We have to pay our bills, we are stressed in our jobs, we have to remember so much stuff, we have to play it over and over in our heads, so we don’t forget to do it.

Imagine this the biggest electrical or phone bill comes in your front door and you do not have the money for it until pay day, but it is overdue. You get a big dose of stress. That is just a one time thing but if you remember it later in the day, that bill stresses you out again and again and again. This one bill torments us, building our stress, shutting down parts of our bodies, and hyping up other parts. Our stores of energy get depleted, and limiting our recovery time. We need a break, but it’s time to get back to work, and so the cycle continues all day. Even when you get home, that one bill is still tormenting you even in your dreams. DEN DEN DENNNnnnn.

We have all experienced that before, it may have not been bills, but some other thing. Maybe it’s just the fact you’re tired and it pisses you off a thousand times a day.

Our brains get hyped up and caught in a loop, its constant stress and worry.

Now for the real lesson: How does our brain being active, affect our bodies? We have all heard of someone or experienced this ourselves, I call it the butterfly effect. Imagine being nervous before an interview or to do a performance, we get butterflies in our stomach, some people even vomit. That is a direct stress response on the digestive system.

I’m sure you remember earlier in the jungle, I said that when the lion attacked, that we shut down non essential parts of our bodies when stressed, well that part is your digestive system. Who needs to digest when your life is threatened? Not me for sure.

For the past two years I’ve had a mild pain in my stomach or let’s say mild discomfort. I’ve had a foggy feeling in my brain for years and real fatigue for much longer.

I have really high standards for myself. I have found most chronic fatigue sufferers are the same.

What I have done wrong is, I have let my thoughts run away with themselves. Churning over and over worrying and stressing over things, that now in hind sight I should have let go.

All these problems have been tough and frustrating, however I am actually grateful for them, would you believe.

I have learned so much about health, nutrition, psychology, fitness and what I am capable of, over the past few years, that i am sure, i would not have learned otherwise.

It is true all the tough times teach you the best things. However you do not have to go through them you can learn from mine. 🙂

I know i would not be here writing this blog if it wasn’t for all the lessons i have learned over the years through not being at my best. For all this i am immensely grateful.

Through all my study and personal development I’ve learned, what I feel is the solution to chronic fatigue.

We have to look at our lives not our problems. We have to look at our body as a whole. If you go to a doctor he does not know about psychology, if you go to a nutritionist they do not know about pathogens, if you got to a psychologist they do not know anything. Ha ha…. It’s funny cos it’s true. I would not recommend going to any of the above 3. They are only focused on problems not solutions and that is not what you want. such as naturopaths, life coaches, NLP practioners, Hypnosis, ayurveda, all these people will give you the direction to get healthy. check out SCIO for a diagnosis and a starting point.

Any way we have to look at our bodies in a whole-istic way.

We have three main aspects to us as human beings; we are mind, body and energy. We have to get all three in balance to feel spectacular or just even good.

I did the bio energy that worked but wasn’t permanent.

I did nutrition, but that didn’t work all the way.

I did psychology which made me think better, but other things kept pulling me back.

The problem was I did not do all three at once. We need good nutrition to have a good energy field. We need good psychology (not stressed) to have good nutrition. The power cable was broken in many places and that stopped the energy flowing.

This is how I’m putting all this together now.

1st. I’m sorting my head out. I’m getting rid of all those negative beliefs that are polluting my brain and my body. This is all to make my thinking easier and there for less stressed, but on top of that I’m starting to meditate, to actually actively calm my brain before i go to bed and in the morning.

If you meditate for half an hour before bed, i find I have an amazing night’s sleep, which as you know is good regeneration time.

When I meditate in the morning, it makes my whole day easier, which is less stressed and there for more recovery time, which makes you way more capable during the stressed times.

2nd. Sorting my nutrition and health out: I’m currently on this 14 day fast which is to give my overworked digestion a break, and letting it re-set its self. When we do a fast it clears all the toxins out, on top of that it clears out all the old fat, muscle and any other shit that is in your system. Basically it kills off all the bad stuff and only leaves a healthy body behind.

I get to start with a clean slate. (Remember what i said at the start. I’m on day seven and I’m feeling the best I have in years and feeling better by the day.)

3rd. I’m going to sort out my energy field. I may not have to do this, as your body and mind generates the actual field, like a magnet. But if I feel it’s necessary, I’ll go do the bio energy healing again at the end of the 14days. But as it is I’m half way and well on my way to feeling the best i have in years.

I hope this is of use to you and you have a fantastic life. I’m certainly feeling more optimistic about mine.

Best of luck.